Guys, girls and handguns
by Mystic25
Summary: In the discombobulated hanging parts after "Designate This", a bit of loose end tying is applied. This is a lil sad...no one dies, it's just sad


"Guys, Girls and Hand Guns"

Title: "Guys, Girls and Hand Guns"

Author: Mystic25

Summary: In the discombobulated hanging parts after "Designate This", a bit of loose end tying is applied. This is a lil sad.

Rating: PG13 for language.

Disclaimer: The song in here isn't mine, don't know who sings it, but it's some one that

isn't me. And of course Dark Angel belongs to Cameron/Eglee and Fox. Suing a poor girl would do you as much good as trying to avoid the IRS.

Author's Note: Sorry about that confusing summary. The season premiere was killer. I still don't like the idea of Logan and Asha, but I think she's kewl. I expected her to be a richy snob, but she's more of a liberal, gun happy fanatic. 

*****

Her eyes snap open in the dark, and immediately she sits up, temporarily unaware of her surroundings. Manticore barracks wall are now replaced by softer, masculine browns and grays.

/Okay, I know I got out from Hell, so where the..? Oh yea, that's right/ She cleared her mind of her questioning rants after realizing that this was Logan's bedroom. And the reason it was so dark was because some how in the night the comforter had wound up over her face.

She threw it off her body with such force that it hit the opposite wall

of the bedroom. A quick glance at the digital clock told her it was 

a little past seven /damn Manticore, now I'm gonna be waking up at 0700

hours forever/ She hopped off the bed, and regretted it a few seconds

later when her muscles locked. All the strain of the escape, plus the

regular morning training sessions and that thirty-mile trek into Seattle 

on foot after hitting Washington reduced her to one gigantic bruise.

She cautiously stretched both arms over her head, popping her back, and

anything else that would give. The gray Seattle skyline peaked out of the north 

window. She stared at it for a while, the half demolished buildings and bruised 

landscape. Not much to look at, but something she had worked so hard for months 

to get back.

One hand idly traced under her gray shirt at the now healed incision in her chest. /Zack, he couldn't have gotten out. Not in that state.The fire spread too fast/ Each heart beat reminded her of what he gave, the unwritten code of the solider, a life for a life.

The door to the room creaked open, and Max was jerked out of her thoughts, and immediately was on the defense.

A head of blonde hair peaked through "Great you're awake." the woman that Max had seen here last night stepped through the doorway. Her chocolate brown leather jacket rustled against her jeans as she approached the bed "I was gonna grab something in here, but didn't know

if you were one of those gals who'd bitch me out for waking them up."

she headed over to the corner of the bedroom.

"I usually don't sleep." Max answered back dropping her legs over the ends of the bed "Did you always come by this early?"

Asha turned to face her for a second. She caught the question that

Max was too polite, or rather she assumed to tired too ask. "It's not 

the norm. I was just lyin' in my bed when I thought 'Oh shit, I need

my stash. So I jetted over here. Logan told me that you were crashed 

out here and made a big deal 'bout not wakin' you, so I've been drinkin' 

coffee for the last thirty minutes." she picked the cardboard box with her armory 

of small hand guns.

"Planning on starting a war?" Max looked over at her collection of silver plated glocks, and pistols.

Asha smiled "These are just my guys. Unlike most boys,their aim from the barrel is dead on." she pulled out the chamber of an old silver six chambered Cobra "This one" she held up the gun in Max's line of sight "is one of my best. Little old, but shoots better then a lot of the iron I have."

"I'm glad." Max said randomly.

Asha threw the gun back in with the rest of them "Guess I'm borin' the

hell out of a Manticore solider by showing weapons she's probably already used."

/Or had used on me/ Max's eyes were drawn to the chambered pistol that

was a dead ringer for the one her clone had shot her with. /Do you know

who I am? BANG! and then nothing../ "Never really used anything small."

she stood up and picked the pistol "Mostly it was semi-automatic this

or hyped up magnum that." The metal felt cool in her hand, finger on the 

trigger, one quick snap, that's all it took, for her, for Zack.

"So.." Asha tried to change the subject, seeing the recent escapee take a trip 

down memory lane "Since I woke Logan up this early, he decided to busy himself 

with making breakfast."

Max smiled to herself /Somethings don't change/ "Guess we better indulge him then." 

she started to walk past the other woman.

"Max." Asha's voice stopped her for a second "My name's Asha."

"Got it last night." Max said not turning around. 

Asha followed her out of the bedroom. She could hear clattering in the kitchen as Logan moved around, preparing food. "The gang's been rounded up." Asha pointed out watching Max sit on the end of the couch arm.

"Great." was all Logan said placing dishes on the table. He set the food around neatly on the shiny surface. "Max?" he glanced over at her sitting passively "Gonna join us?"

"Yea I'm commin'" she forced a half smile "Can't resist your food."

she went for the nearest chair, and cursed a blue streak under her breath at her body's protests to her actions.

"Something wrong?" Logan asked, concern evident in his voice.

"Haven't sat in something this soft in a while." she tried to make a joke out of it. A couple of cracks to the right place and she was able to slide into the chair, albeit painfully.

Max ate in silence, listening to Asha regale Logan with things she found out about that vaccine that Max had stolen from the Manticore labs.

"That's the fastest shit I've ever seen." Asha commented around a sip of orange juice.

"No place like 'home' for all your needs." Max spat out shoveling some

eggs into her mouth. Logan had cooked up another flavorful meal, but it all tasted bland to her. At Manticore, the sludge was only enough to keep you going and alive. They called it 'endurance training' She had missed eating ACUTAL food, but now that she had that chance it all tasted like sand. It was the same place, the same food she had eaten for months before her capture, but this wasn't the same environment she had left.

"Guess they were good for something." Logan stated, stealing a glance at her. She was thinner then before, but areas that use to house only flesh, were now were packed with muscle, Manticore had hardened her, and in more ways then one, judging by her eyes.

"Comforting thought." Max commented, finishing off her last bite.

She hastily stood up to chuck her empty plate in the sink.

"She's so tightly wound." Asha whispered to Logan "Always on full alert."

"That's what a life on the run does for you." Logan replied back.

After dumping her stuff in the sink, Max sat silently by the large window.

Thoughts of last night kept coming back to her. She wondered if Logan had shaken

off that virus completely, wondered if she could ever lay a hand on him again

without fear of killing him, and as much as she wanted to deny it, she wondered

what the dealio was between him and Asha. Were they friends? partners? lovers?

That last idea seemed a little extreme judging by that lip locking session

she had with the man the day before. But, it was probably just relief at her 

being alive, heat of the moment melodrama.

"Not much to look at?" Asha stared out the same window.

"Use to be home for me." Max shrugged. She didn't even know where she belonged

now, her world had changed since that fateful night, now she felt like a loner.

"He missed you ya know." Asha looked at the other woman. "Talked about you constantly"

Max faced her "Guess that makes me special."

"Why don't you just admit that you missed him too girl?" Asha shot back "The tough

ass solider act is old."

Max whirled on her "A lil FYI, I AM a solider, it ain't no fuckin' act!" she stood

up from her spot on the couch "Just because you shacked up with Eyes Only don't give

you the damn right to mess with my shit for a life!" she turned sharply on her heal.

Logan nearly collided with her as he came in the other direction. "What was that all

about?"

Max didn't voice it, but nearly running into Logan scared her down to her Manticore

tinkered chromosomes. /I'm not gonna let him die because of this damn virus running

ramped in my veins./ She by passed him, not making any body contact. Worried as she

was, she went for the blunt snap back "Bite me!" she stormed off into his bedroom.

The door slamming rattled the whole apartment. Max flipped herself angrily on the

bed. /Why did this have to happen? Freedom was so close I could taste it, and now

I'm totally screwed. I don't belong at Manticore. And I sure as hell don't belong

here anymore./ She traced the scar again. /If Zack were here, he'd kick my ass for

giving in to emotions. And I kick his for telling me how to live my life. But he's

not Maxie, he's gone, because of you./ Her thoughts made her physically angry, she 

kicked the night table, breaking a huge hole in the wood. 

Her rampage did not end there, she kicked in the remains of the table, scattering

chunks of wood and the nightstand's contents across the floor.

"Max, what the hell-?" Logan came through the door. He saw all the remains of

his maimed cherry wood night table. And standing near his bed was an out of breath

Max, her chest heaving from her actions. He started to take one step towards her.

"Don't!" she ordered, holding up her hand in a halting gesture.

"Max-" he took another step, and froze dead in his tracks when she picked up

a gun from Asha's stack and aimed it at him.

"Just stay back." her words were half ordering half pleading

"Max.." he repeated again "Put the gun down."

"You don't get it do you Logan?" she retorted with as much sorrow as venom. "It's

over, whatever we had, it's all shot to hell. Got the Manticore seal of approval

and everything."

"The virus is gone Max." Logan stated "You gave me the right stuff."

"But I still have it in me!" she spat back. "That bitch covered all her bases,

there's no way to get rid of it."

"There's still hope-" Logan argued, trying to calm her down enough to drop the

gun. He didn't fear for his safety, but for hers, and her sanity.

"I hate to wake you from your dream world Logan, but hope doesn't exist in 

this reality."

"Hope exists in EVERY reality Max." Logan disputed gently "If you want it bad

enough."

"You don't think that I do?" Max shot back "For ten fucking months, I wanted

to get out of that Hell. I sawed through my cell every fucking night, each 

time getting closer to escape. I endured weeks of being folded like a genetic 

cocktail pretzel in a vice crusher, held in water tanks, and reminded of all

the FUCKING shit I did to my siblings, just so I could come back here. I had

hope. I wanted to find you." her mood changed from boiling anger, to a sad 

storm of emotions. "To see you again." she laughed bitterly. "And now that's

all that I can do."

"Drop it!" Asha's voice called out, aiming one of her sigs at Max.

"I got this one Asha." Logan reassured.

"Sure looks like you do." she shot back.

"All I can do is watch. A damn observer." Max's voice shook slightly. "I was

more screwed up then I thought I was if I believed things wouldn't change."

her shaking became evident in her hands. The gun clattered to the floor. She

caught herself on her hands before she hit the ground.

"Max!" Logan called out, watching her start to convulse.

Somehow Max managed to clamor to her feet. "Leave me alone!" she called out

weakly.

Asha pointed her sig down to the ground as she watched Max shakily move into

the bathroom. "What's wrong with her?"

"She has seizures." Logan informed "She was one of the prototypes. Manticore

was still perfecting the hybrids in her class, and some of them had flaws." 

"Loop hole in the DNA?" Asha asked.

Logan didn't answer and walked over to his closed bathroom door. "Max,

you okay in there?" he pounded louder when she didn't reply "Max!"

"I'm fine." came a barely audible reply. "I'm completely fucked up, but

I'm fine."

"You need you meds Max, you won't be able to last much longer." Logan

was worried about what would happen.

"Snagged a few from that bottle under your sink." she let him know "Guess

you don't throw anything away." she curled into a ball on his linoleum floor,

drawing her knees to her chest, leaning against the cabinets under the sink. She

tried to ride out the pain. /Soldiers know no pain Maxie..but I'm not a solider.

You are now..things aren't what they use to be./

"I know we can beat this thing." Logan reassured.

"Never lie to the revved up solider." Max called out from beyond the door. She

gasped as another wave of pain launched itself up her spine. 

"You still there?" Logan was growing more and more concerned as the minutes ticked

away. He felt so helpless, just like at that raid on Manticore. Only now Max was

alive and whole, right through one single bolted locked door, but he still couldn't 

reach her.

"Somewhere under all this mess." she called back, through gritted teeth. She couldn't

help the longing she had to want him in here, despite it all, seizures were dark and

horrible to go through alone. "Logan?"

"I'm still here Max." he let her know.

"If I wasn't fucked up with this virus, you'd be in here right?" she sounded unsure,

like a lost child.

"Yea I would." he stated strongly "Faster then you can peel down a road on your baby."

Max smiled slightly through her haze. "I wanna touch you." her voice was unbearably

sad and lonely "I wanna touch you so bad."

Logan felt something tug deep at his gut. He sat down on the ground, and leaned

up against the door "Me too." he sighed, suddenly thinking of an idea "Max?"

"Yea?"

"Can you put your hand to the door?"

"Yea why?"

"Don't ask questions. Just do it."

Max slowly raised one sweat soaked hand to the white door. "What now?"

"Where'd you put it?" Logan asked.

"Under the knob." she answered "Is this going somewhere?"

Logan didn't respond, but merely placed his hand in the same place on the

other side of the door. "Not the traditional way of holding hands, but it 

works for me."

Max splayed her hand out on her side "No nasty infections-" her words broke

off near the end. She smoothed her palm over the slick surface.

"That's a plus." Logan said softly.

Max leaned her head against the cool door, riding out the last of her seizure.

She kept that hand positioned right over Logan's on the opposite side. "God, I

hate this!" she ran her free hand shakily through her hair. "Damn bitch Renfro."

she bit her lip to keep her emotions at bay "I wanna hold you, but I can't." a few

tears splashed on the tile floor.

"I want to hold you too Max." Logan whispered, palming the door. He stole a glance

behind him, noting that Asha was now sitting on the bed, just looking at him.

Logan's revelation did little to ease Max's suffering, knowing that he wanted

physical contact as badly as she did just made it hurt more. Unchecked tears

ran down her face, sliding cold and wet to the linoleum. /Emotions make you weak

Maxie..weak links can't make up a strong structure./ Despite her berating solider

side, a sob broke free, then another, strangled cries of emotion emitting from her 

lips, like that of a wounded animal with its underbelly ripped open, left in a 

lonely place to die. 

He listened to the desolate sounds coming from his bathroom, and he couldn't do

anything but sit there, just like Max had said, he was just a witness to her pain.

"Why don't you just go in there?" Asha suggested.

"Don't you think I don't want that?" Logan snapped back, not turning around. "It's

killing me to listen to this, but how can I? I am no comfort to Max if I'm dead."

"You don't know that you'd be dead asshole." Asha returned with gentle fierceness.

"That shit might have given you immunity."

"And if it didn't? What then?" Logan turned again to face her.

Asha held up the bottle of the antigen "We have enough to fix it in case of one

round."

"Fine." Logan shot back, "but the door's locked on the inside."

"Great deduction Sherlock." Asha sighed standing up from the bed, and walked over to 

him. She pulled out a credit card, a few good gestures and the door slid open. "You're 

out of excuses." She cautiously slid the door open, in case Max might be behind it.

Logan stepped through the doorway "Max?" What he saw there made his heart stop.

She was now backed up against his bathtub, curled into herself, her face wet with

tears, and small tremors still racking her body.

She looked up when he called her name "Please just leave." her eyes held all the

horror and hell she had recently survived. /Out of one hell, and into another..

and endless cycle of black./

Unlike last time, he didn't listen, and kneeled next to her, not touching, but

in close proximity. He looked over at Asha, who was filling the syringe with enough

of the antigen that was needed. Turning back to face Max, he gently reached out and 

touched her face.

She jerked back, as if she had been burned "Don't. What the hell are you trying to

do, get yourself killed?"

"Max.." his first touch had no affect, no awful seizing and pain, just soft cold,

pale skin beneath his hand. He wiped away one tear with his thumb, and moved closer

to her mouth.

"No, I don't want to hurt you.." she pulled away from him.

Logan gripped her chin, forcing him to look at her. He didn't say anything as he

looked into those sorrowful eyes. He leaned in and pressed his lips to hers.

"Stop.." her voice was muffled by his mouth on hers. /I can't loose you again,

not like this, not by my own hand./

Logan waited, waited for the pain, the tremors the blackness, but it never came.

Soft supple lips pressed against his own, dampness on his face from her tears, 

that's all he felt. /It might just be because of the antigen. Once its gone, I

don't know..but this is enough for now. Death by the kiss of an angel, wouldn't

be so bad./

After a minute he pulled back to look at her. God, she looked so scared, afraid

for his life, and what she could've done. He pulled back a piece of hair from her

face.

Asha moved out of the apartment, snagging her gun box on the way. One thing for 

certain, there was something to be said about living in the moment. The front door

closed behind her.

"I missed you." Logan touched her hair.

"So did I." she looked at him with tearful eyes. "I thought..I'd never get to

do this again.." she trailed off into a sob. /Weak link Maxi…shut the FUCK UP!/

"It's okay we'll figure something out." he hoped he sounded convincing "Remember

Eyes Only is all powerful."

This forced a tiny smile on her face "there is that." her eyes glistened in the 

light.

He gently kissed her on the forehead and pulled her to his body, wanting to 

take advantage of the opportunity to touch her, however long it lasted. 

Max hugged him fiercely. /God please don't let this be the last time, please

let me have this./ "Don't let go."

"I won't" Logan reassured, this time he knew he could offer her this. "I

promise. Even if I can't touch you physically anymore after this, I'll never 

let you go." He leaned back against the bathtub, holding his fallen angel in 

his lap.

OH, WHY YOU LOOK SO SAD?   
TEARS ARE IN YOUR EYES   
COME ON AND COME TO ME NOW   
DON'T BE ASHAMED TO CRY   
LET ME SEE YOU THROUGH   
'CAUSE I'VE SEEN THE DARK SIDE TOO   
WHEN THE NIGHT FALLS ON YOU   
YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO   
NOTHING YOU CONFESS   
COULD MAKE ME LOVE YOU LESS 

I'LL STAND BY YOU   
I'LL STAND BY YOU   
WON'T LET NOBODY HURT YOU   
I'LL STAND BY YOU

(FADE TO BLACK)

*****

I tried not to have Logan be one hundred percent sure that things would be fixed between him and Max having physical contact. I know Dark Angel will probably play around with this. Almost went for the fairy tale thing, but reality got in the way. Still hoped you liked it…and virtual tissues are being sent to anyone who needs them.


End file.
